Dearest One,
It’s been so long my dear, I’m sorry. I don’t know if I’m still the writer who captures men’s hearts, just like the old times. The pen that I used to hold whenever I write letters suddenly bid its dying note. It took me a long, long time to pull inspiration from the universe, but I’m actually asking for another pen, I never thought that it would be better than a ballpoint I wished all my life.
Why is it that whenever I find the time to put words and describe how handsome you are in my eyes, I can’t find any? At first, I pity myself. Maybe, I’m not an effective writer, and words just don’t want to follow my train of thoughts. I flipped the lexicon’s pages; tried asking experts to give me the idea, but their answers never satisfied me. I asked the Almighty, “I know, I’ve been too bad all my life. All these years, I never followed the Ten Commandments fully. And I don’t know how to pray correctly. Please forgive me if I ate my sister’s banana cake when she’s asleep. That’s stealing – I’m sorry. I hope you’ve forgiven me. Oh! Kindly help looking for the best word to describe him, please? Thank you.” I’m a sinner, but the Almighty is really kind. And He didn’t give the answer I’m looking for right away. He made me think and I thank Him for as time goes by, and I get to know you more, I found the answer.
I can’t find the word to best describe how enlightening it is when your luminescent eyes look my way – you make me insane. Much more, how great it is to see the corners of your eyes wrinkle whenever you laugh – you hypnotize me. And whenever you talk of how magnificent each simple thing is – you make me love the whole world more. I love these things about you, for it describes you. I love it when you fix your hair that wildly blown by the wind, and you curse yourself for not bringing the hair gel with you - you’re still handsome my love. I love it more when you mispronounce some complex words - you’re still the best speaker for me. I love how you try to stop your tears from flowing whenever you watch the late night show – you look good at it. And every time you feel ecstatic when you perfectly got a new step, whether a cultural or modern dance - you’re the cutest being in this world. It’s hard to describe how funny it is to listen to your old jokes and funny stories – they’re always funny despite the cobwebs growing in it.
I love seeing how my happy-go-lucky self transformed into a responsible one because of your pieces of advice. You opened my eyes to a sweet reality that life has something to unfold for us. That in ever bitter failure is a saccharine surprise at the end. You taught me to love the spiders, the caterpillars and even the ants. Your happy aura pulled me to join you and live every single moment this life happily. Whoever I am now, the reason is you. You changed me into someone I never thought existed. I never even knew that I’ve got a funny side too.
My love, this letter is not enough to express how lucky I am to have you. These words aren’t enough to tell you how abandoned I’ll be if one day you decided to leave me alone. I thank God for giving you to me, that instead of giving me another ballpoint pen – he gave me an inspiration to hold the pen again. He gave me the reason to believe that this world loves me too. My love, with you by my side, everything’s possible. Even reaching absolute zero would be very promising in my eyes. Maybe you’re wondering why I entitled “An Empty Love Letter” into this work of mine. That’s how I’d be without you in my life – an empty letter: meaningless, wordless, and worthless. Thank you love, I know I’ll have more and more days to live with you. I love you my dear. Always have that with you. Oh! I’d like to thank you for staying up too late last night just to ask me if I got home safe -- I felt that I am in the safest zone in the world because you want me to be on it. Though we are 31.5 kilometers away from each other, I can still see you dream with me and my dreams are nothing but the sweetest. Good morning my love! I’ll see you after we fix our respective lives so that we can build our own and we need to go to the grocery and buy some stuff for the rainy season. I don't want to go out, for I feel the joy and excitement when I lay my head to your arms and have a nice and deep sleep. Not thinking about what will happen tomorrow, because what matters to us is, NOW.
FROM:
The woman who’ll always be
head-over-heels in love
with you.
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Monday, September 10, 2012
First Destination for 2013.
Last weekend was so far the best weekend for me since I started working. Those two days really made me feel blessed, liked, guided, loved and a whole lot more. Thanks to one of my most favorite person on Earth, Celine Bautista and my ever reliable ate, Ate Krishia Cornelio. Though I am sick the whole weekend, I still had the best by spending it with them.
And before I forgot, I am also with one of the most awesome person in the whole wide world. I mean, thank you, Mr. ******! XD
By the way, out of the blue, my friend Celine, just saw a deal on metrodeal.com. In that website, some companies or establishments offer some affordable deals, from small stuffs up to the biggest that one can ever imagine and a GREAT DEAL caught our attention, and that is a deal TRIP TO PALAWAN.
Hahaha! We really want to travel. Actually, we planned to go to Incheon, South Korea pero hindi natuloy kasi, after graduation, we're all busy with our respective jobs.
For those who don't know where on Earth is Palawan's location.
There you go! That is the location of our beloved paradise here in the country. :) And another FYI, this is where the new wonder of the world is situated, Puerto Princesa Underground River.
We are planning to visit this next year, preferably March 2013. In time for my 21st birthday! (Another debut!) But before we fly our asses off to that magnificent place, we have to save money for this and to our future plans. But as early as now, I wanna say,"SEE YOU PALAWAN!" ^_^
And before I forgot, I am also with one of the most awesome person in the whole wide world. I mean, thank you, Mr. ******! XD
By the way, out of the blue, my friend Celine, just saw a deal on metrodeal.com. In that website, some companies or establishments offer some affordable deals, from small stuffs up to the biggest that one can ever imagine and a GREAT DEAL caught our attention, and that is a deal TRIP TO PALAWAN.
Hahaha! We really want to travel. Actually, we planned to go to Incheon, South Korea pero hindi natuloy kasi, after graduation, we're all busy with our respective jobs.
For those who don't know where on Earth is Palawan's location.
There you go! That is the location of our beloved paradise here in the country. :) And another FYI, this is where the new wonder of the world is situated, Puerto Princesa Underground River.
We are planning to visit this next year, preferably March 2013. In time for my 21st birthday! (Another debut!) But before we fly our asses off to that magnificent place, we have to save money for this and to our future plans. But as early as now, I wanna say,"SEE YOU PALAWAN!" ^_^
Images courtesy of Google.
Friday, September 7, 2012
Dear Career...
Let me tell you what I feel right now.
I never expected that I will feel this because I know in the first place, I am a bit secured about everything. Today, September 7 is my self-proclaimed day. Why? Because I have seen a lot of career opportunities on my way and all I have to do is take risks and grab them.
My uncle sent me an advertisement from his company with all its job offerings. He is working in telephone company for ages and I believe he has the power to help me land a decent job and of course, salary. I checked it and there you go, lots of job offerings in that group of companies (You might have the slightest idea what company I am referring to) and the nearest possible job for me is customer service representative. It happened to be my dream job while I was studying because it is on its highest peak that time and you'll earn a lot. But as time passes by, you know, dreams and plans change.
Another is, my dear friend way back in college (of course, until now) sent me an invitation to her company. An interview and examination invitation as a proofreader/editor. It is in line with my course. Yeah, English majors are really prone and exposed to proofreading ang editing stuff. It has been our life for 4 years. I like the job, because I can use what I learned from college. (Not the salary muna, I don't have any idea pa. Since this friend of mine and I don't talk about our salaries, really. Right teh?)
This entry is not meant to boast anything or who I am. I am actually nothing compared to other people and I am just a typical fresh graduate who went out of the university and graduated without any concrete plans of what I am going to do with my life.
My problem now is that, I already have a job. I've been here for 5 months and now on probation. So far, I am enjoying my job, because this is my second pick on jobs. Being an online English teacher. (My first one's too good to be just my dream.) My concept of job is not on the salary, REALLY. Maybe that's one point but I am not after with the salary. I believe that as long as you're happy with what you are doing, you'll succeed. But you must accept that it is not instant success. You have strive harder each day for you to attain what you really want and then money comes afterwards.
As of this moment, my mind's really messed up if I am going to do full time on that group of companies of I'd go part time on my friend's company. And when I made up my decision, I don't want to disappoint anyone because of my decisions. Like, you see, I can't handle stray bullets which are meant for me.
Maybe sometimes, all you have to do is to decide and take risks. Because you can't have it all... Rolling in the deep... (Just kidding!) Seriously, you can't have it all. You should've opted to commit suicide if you want to have all those jobs. Hahaha!
I think, I have two things to do before I decide. First, think and second, of course, pray. :)
I never expected that I will feel this because I know in the first place, I am a bit secured about everything. Today, September 7 is my self-proclaimed day. Why? Because I have seen a lot of career opportunities on my way and all I have to do is take risks and grab them.
My uncle sent me an advertisement from his company with all its job offerings. He is working in telephone company for ages and I believe he has the power to help me land a decent job and of course, salary. I checked it and there you go, lots of job offerings in that group of companies (You might have the slightest idea what company I am referring to) and the nearest possible job for me is customer service representative. It happened to be my dream job while I was studying because it is on its highest peak that time and you'll earn a lot. But as time passes by, you know, dreams and plans change.
Another is, my dear friend way back in college (of course, until now) sent me an invitation to her company. An interview and examination invitation as a proofreader/editor. It is in line with my course. Yeah, English majors are really prone and exposed to proofreading ang editing stuff. It has been our life for 4 years. I like the job, because I can use what I learned from college. (Not the salary muna, I don't have any idea pa. Since this friend of mine and I don't talk about our salaries, really. Right teh?)
This entry is not meant to boast anything or who I am. I am actually nothing compared to other people and I am just a typical fresh graduate who went out of the university and graduated without any concrete plans of what I am going to do with my life.
My problem now is that, I already have a job. I've been here for 5 months and now on probation. So far, I am enjoying my job, because this is my second pick on jobs. Being an online English teacher. (My first one's too good to be just my dream.) My concept of job is not on the salary, REALLY. Maybe that's one point but I am not after with the salary. I believe that as long as you're happy with what you are doing, you'll succeed. But you must accept that it is not instant success. You have strive harder each day for you to attain what you really want and then money comes afterwards.
As of this moment, my mind's really messed up if I am going to do full time on that group of companies of I'd go part time on my friend's company. And when I made up my decision, I don't want to disappoint anyone because of my decisions. Like, you see, I can't handle stray bullets which are meant for me.
Maybe sometimes, all you have to do is to decide and take risks. Because you can't have it all... Rolling in the deep... (Just kidding!) Seriously, you can't have it all. You should've opted to commit suicide if you want to have all those jobs. Hahaha!
I think, I have two things to do before I decide. First, think and second, of course, pray. :)
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Do you feel any PRESSURE right now?
Have you ever had that feeling that the world is on your shoulders and you have nothing to do but to bring it everyday?
As a 20 year old young lady, yes, I do feel that feeling.
It feels like, everybody's fond of pressuring someone most especially if they don't know what you've been through. May mga tao talaga sigurong hobby yung ganun. Yung magbigay ng pressure.
Since I started working last April, (that's a month before I march for my degree) people around me has been doing this scumbag hobby. They want you to do things according to their will. Yeah, I do understand that it is for my own sake and they know what's the best choice in life since they are a lot older than I am. But one thing I don't like about this, is that, being concern is already below the belt. I don't feel the concern anymore. I can feel is the pagiging pakielamera about simple and complex stuff in my life. Like handling money, giving certain people in my life and even the clothes I wear. They want my life to be like theirs, which is according to them, "CLOSE TO PERFECTION".
Sometimes, my parents also do this. They want me to transfer another company because they want me to earn more and save money for me to pursue my graduate studies. Yes, I want to earn more because I am beginning to feel the needs of a working girl, but they can't see my point that everyone must start from the bottom. And those are collectively known as humble beginnings. I know, graduate studies really costs a lot of money, but I think they don't understand my point that I NEED MORE CONFIDENCE to face another chapter in my academic life.
They keep on saying it every time I go home in Laguna. You know, to rest and to sleep even for just 2 days. But it goes the other way around. They've been goofing around me that, I SHOULD GET A NEW JOB and I WON'T BE GETTING ANY FROM WHAT I'VE DOING FOR THE PAST 5 months.
I mean, I am a fresh graduate. I don't want to be bummer at home and I don't think it will be helpful for me and my stressful job that I hear people around me and goofing these things in my head. I wonder, what are they doing way back when they were still 20 and struggling to get a career and a high paid job? What do they feel and do their parents and other people around them do these to them? Like, are you just saying this because you care or you want to manipulate my life?
I don't mean to be rude or to be a scumbag daughter and citizen. I just want to release all these, because I have no one to talk to and I don't think they will understand. Wiw.
As a 20 year old young lady, yes, I do feel that feeling.
It feels like, everybody's fond of pressuring someone most especially if they don't know what you've been through. May mga tao talaga sigurong hobby yung ganun. Yung magbigay ng pressure.
Since I started working last April, (that's a month before I march for my degree) people around me has been doing this scumbag hobby. They want you to do things according to their will. Yeah, I do understand that it is for my own sake and they know what's the best choice in life since they are a lot older than I am. But one thing I don't like about this, is that, being concern is already below the belt. I don't feel the concern anymore. I can feel is the pagiging pakielamera about simple and complex stuff in my life. Like handling money, giving certain people in my life and even the clothes I wear. They want my life to be like theirs, which is according to them, "CLOSE TO PERFECTION".
Sometimes, my parents also do this. They want me to transfer another company because they want me to earn more and save money for me to pursue my graduate studies. Yes, I want to earn more because I am beginning to feel the needs of a working girl, but they can't see my point that everyone must start from the bottom. And those are collectively known as humble beginnings. I know, graduate studies really costs a lot of money, but I think they don't understand my point that I NEED MORE CONFIDENCE to face another chapter in my academic life.
They keep on saying it every time I go home in Laguna. You know, to rest and to sleep even for just 2 days. But it goes the other way around. They've been goofing around me that, I SHOULD GET A NEW JOB and I WON'T BE GETTING ANY FROM WHAT I'VE DOING FOR THE PAST 5 months.
I mean, I am a fresh graduate. I don't want to be bummer at home and I don't think it will be helpful for me and my stressful job that I hear people around me and goofing these things in my head. I wonder, what are they doing way back when they were still 20 and struggling to get a career and a high paid job? What do they feel and do their parents and other people around them do these to them? Like, are you just saying this because you care or you want to manipulate my life?
I don't mean to be rude or to be a scumbag daughter and citizen. I just want to release all these, because I have no one to talk to and I don't think they will understand. Wiw.
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
A Ballooney Patootey
Aside from my screwed-up sleeping schedule, another thing that keeps me worrying is me gaining weight. Argh! Before I checked my weight earlier this morning, I got the chance to see and check my weight last April (last week of April to be specific) and by that time, I am weighing 60 lbs. It's not normal for a twenty year old gal, but that's my maintaning weight since I entered Senior year, way back when I was in college and plans to lose some pa bit by bit.
But when I got "the opportunity" to check my current weight, I was like, SURPRISED and a bit PISSED. Since May 2012 up to this moment, I gained 10 LBS.! For 4 months, I gained 10 POUNDS. (If you want to convert to kilograms, divide it by 2 then viola! There's the answer for you pal. I am weighing 31, in kilograms) T____T and this is alarming, really.
I really want to cry, not because I don't love myself or my body. But my point is, it is not good to the eyes if you're fat and another thing, a lot of friends told me na "Sam, tumataba ka na naman!". I was like, staying away from all the temptations of food and everything, because I really want to lose weight.
While on my way to work, I had this epiphany that I've been doing a lot of bad habits that caused me to be in those numbers. I won't be proud to present to you...
SAM's BAD HABITS.
1. MY F*CKED UP SLEEPING HABITS. I used to log out from work at 11PM. If you're expecting me to be the sleeping pal by 12:30AM, you are definitely wrong. I will still be your friend at 12:30AM onwards. I usually sleep at 4AM then wakes up at 10-11:30AM. That makes me eat more because I wasn't able to have my breakfast and have the tendency to eat more at lunch time and munch more in merienda time.
2. NO EXERCISE. AT ALL. I no longer jog in the morning, I don't dance na that lot compared to what I've been doing in the 1st quarter of the year, I don't go out a lot, etc. I feel like I am always tired and stuff. Yes, I still do dance. But the pa-cute dance na lang. I miss playing volleyball as well. :(
3. IRREGULAR BOWEL MOVEMENT. I do "the thing" only twice a week. :( If not for the help of herbal teas, I won't be able to visit our bowl every now and then. I've been like this for years now. My mom is always worrying and now that I am 20 years old, she still checks me doing the thing because if not, it might cause colon cancer.
4. I DON'T DRINK WATER THAT MUCH. I am more of a tea person. I find water soooo boring! So plain and not that exciting compared to what tea and other juices offer me and my urine's a bit yellowish that adds alarm to my parents as well.
5. I DON'T EAT VEGETABLES. For me, those green things are like monsters. They should not be disturbed or else, they'll eat you. I only eat 3 vegetables. (And according to articles, these are not considered as vegetables, really. They are half-half. Half-veggie, half-fruit)
6. I DON'T APPRECIATE FRUITS THAT MUCH. I am not a fruity person. I don't eat them unless mandated.
Well, those are some of my allegations on why I am gaining weight again. For you who reads this, take care of yourself or else, you'll become more of a ballooney patootey!
Love your body and maintain a balance yet healthy diet. I got to say HI again to Biguerlai and Kankunis. :(
But when I got "the opportunity" to check my current weight, I was like, SURPRISED and a bit PISSED. Since May 2012 up to this moment, I gained 10 LBS.! For 4 months, I gained 10 POUNDS. (If you want to convert to kilograms, divide it by 2 then viola! There's the answer for you pal. I am weighing 31, in kilograms) T____T and this is alarming, really.
I really want to cry, not because I don't love myself or my body. But my point is, it is not good to the eyes if you're fat and another thing, a lot of friends told me na "Sam, tumataba ka na naman!". I was like, staying away from all the temptations of food and everything, because I really want to lose weight.
While on my way to work, I had this epiphany that I've been doing a lot of bad habits that caused me to be in those numbers. I won't be proud to present to you...
SAM's BAD HABITS.
1. MY F*CKED UP SLEEPING HABITS. I used to log out from work at 11PM. If you're expecting me to be the sleeping pal by 12:30AM, you are definitely wrong. I will still be your friend at 12:30AM onwards. I usually sleep at 4AM then wakes up at 10-11:30AM. That makes me eat more because I wasn't able to have my breakfast and have the tendency to eat more at lunch time and munch more in merienda time.
2. NO EXERCISE. AT ALL. I no longer jog in the morning, I don't dance na that lot compared to what I've been doing in the 1st quarter of the year, I don't go out a lot, etc. I feel like I am always tired and stuff. Yes, I still do dance. But the pa-cute dance na lang. I miss playing volleyball as well. :(
3. IRREGULAR BOWEL MOVEMENT. I do "the thing" only twice a week. :( If not for the help of herbal teas, I won't be able to visit our bowl every now and then. I've been like this for years now. My mom is always worrying and now that I am 20 years old, she still checks me doing the thing because if not, it might cause colon cancer.
4. I DON'T DRINK WATER THAT MUCH. I am more of a tea person. I find water soooo boring! So plain and not that exciting compared to what tea and other juices offer me and my urine's a bit yellowish that adds alarm to my parents as well.
5. I DON'T EAT VEGETABLES. For me, those green things are like monsters. They should not be disturbed or else, they'll eat you. I only eat 3 vegetables. (And according to articles, these are not considered as vegetables, really. They are half-half. Half-veggie, half-fruit)
6. I DON'T APPRECIATE FRUITS THAT MUCH. I am not a fruity person. I don't eat them unless mandated.
Well, those are some of my allegations on why I am gaining weight again. For you who reads this, take care of yourself or else, you'll become more of a ballooney patootey!
Love your body and maintain a balance yet healthy diet. I got to say HI again to Biguerlai and Kankunis. :(
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